Sketches on Atheism

How animals got their stripes

ZEBRA MEME

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106 thoughts on “How animals got their stripes

      • guess it doesn’t if you don’t want it reproduced. even if I can’t do it, my wife who is a witch might be able to. faith isn’t about religion… when someone puts that label on it, it is no longer faith – it is man.

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      • No, she isn’t Wiccan. She is a witch. it’s a separate thing although many people love to call her that. She actually really hates that term.
        It’s actually much more easier than you could imagine, do you have an e-mail. we could chat. ?

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      • it is easier because I see people as people, not as the masks they like to wear to identify them in specific groups. a lot of Christians I know (including my own parents) believe that you cant be gay and Christian. I’m that, too. they say you can’t be “unequally yoked” (this is in the Bible). I think the reason that it is in the Bible is because the one who said it knew it might be more challenging to individuals with different beliefs trying to support each other… but being human is about free will. so, for me, it’s easy. i see the magic inside of her, i see who she really is and i love her. so i don’t care what other Christians say about me. including the parents. i just keep doing me. and keep listening. i will never close my mind like many Christians have chosen to do.

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      • Ah, understood. i thought you were talking about her performing magic. Good attitude. be nice if most so-called Christians thought the same way as you.

        Now, back to the magic. I’d love to see it.

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      • yeah, she enjoys casting spells and all that jazz. they usually work. she uses a lot of different herbs and such. last year she did a love spell for a friend, that friend found a mate shortly after and has been with him ever since. some spells take longer than others to take effect, but it all depends on the person who she is doing the spell for. how much they believe in it is how much will happen. similar to my own faith when you think about it. I’m not sure when we can get to Brazil, we are in the US now. we want to go abroad, but don’t yet have the funds unfortunately. =/

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      • how much they believe in it is how much will happen

        Yes, that does appear to the magic ingredient in miracle-works. Does your wife work at hospitals curing the sick?

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      • my wife is working in mental health, she is a peer support counselor so she helps in that small way. she hasn’t had as much faith as she used to, so I haven’t seen her do as much magic recently as she was. she SHOULD be doing more. she hasn’t been doing enough, but I know she herself is struggling with all she has on her plate. me, I am focusing more on homeless and those financially burdened. I am basically Robin Hood reincarnated. it’s a lot of fun, actually.

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    • Steve, don’t be such a militant, strident, angry atheist. Asking a legitimate question – how does looking at the sticks while mating influence skin patterns of offspring? By what physiological mechanism? – is the height of disrespect. After all, scripture MUST BE factually correct, you dolt, because it IS scripture, you see. Because we know the true author of the bybull is perfect, we know its content is perfect (Ken Ham and ColorStorm and Wally and David and CT and IB22 have told me so). So the problem must be YOU in how YOU interpret this literal… umm… I mean, ahem, figurative BUT ABSOLUTELY TRUE!… passage. Shut down your brain before it’s too late and come to Christ before the Dark Side claims you.

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      • I think what we’re seeing is to be expected: the small manifestations of deluded thinking allowed to take root without critical review, without any desire on his part to not fool one’s self, to be credulous to the point of gullibility as if this offers special insight into reality, confirmed to himself one tiny step at a time so that we end up with someone who honestly and openly and without guile actually thinks “with faith anything is possible”, someone quite willingly says as if a positive attribute that, “i (sic) am Christian,” and is so because, “i (sic) have seen a lot of miracles since i was born.”

        This is confirmation bias in action and he would know that if he utilized critical rather than gullible faith-based thinking. You’ve already highlighted the core belief, that “how much they believe in it is how much will happen,” which is the essential ingredient to delusional thinking, the belief that belief can be imposed on reality and cause reality to align with it.

        If unchecked, this belief in the power of faith will lead him to coming into conflict with reality that really could be disastrous in that reality will not be denied its indifferent arbitration of this incorrect belief when the claim is tested by circumstance. That the belief will be found to be factually wrong is a poor consolation… and perhaps even more so if accompanied by terrible consequences not just for him but maybe a child that will then have to live with these consequences of his self-accepted, self-confirmed delusional thinking.

        The good news is that this way of faith-based thinking can be changed. The bad news is that the reasons to do so probably won’t arise in any convincing fashion until a fair bit of harm (as if in punishment) is encountered.

        And it’s all so unnecessary…

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      • Do the experiment: make a comedy show mixing ridiculous statements in bible-style with such ridiculous passages from the bible. Present it as a satire show in front of true believers. Not everybody will know the bible so well that he/she will be able to spot the difference… They are going to protest even in such cases where it is the original text.

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  1. Most convincing argument I’ve ever read. Why would anyone doubt it? Well, I’m off to the hardware store to by some scales to glue onto the baby fish that were just born in my aquarium. What? Did you think fish got their scales some OTHER way? Duh!

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  2. Pingback: How animals got their stripes | Christians Anonymous

    • SOM wants more, not less, atheists?

      Cool~!

      Would it work if we included the Koran too?
      And the Book of Mormon, and whatever it is that Jewish and Shinto and Buddhist and Hindu and (insert religion of choice here) use? Or are we supportring just one major franchise here?

      Liked by 1 person

  3. …And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, “O LORD, bless this Thy hand grenade that with it Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits, in Thy mercy.” And the LORD did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu… [At this point, the friar is urged by Brother Maynard to “skip a bit, brother”]… And the LORD spake, saying, “First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.”

    – re: the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog and the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch (Monty Python and the Holy Grail)

    Just like the biblical explanation for zebra stripes… mind-numbing!

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  4. Way back when i was about 15, i took it upon myself to read the bible from one end to the other. (Forgive me if I skipped a few begats, that got old quick) I remember this verse striking me as WTF? Really? People believe this shit?

    Yes indeedy folks please encourage your youngsters to read the bible. It obviously did me a lot of good. 🙂

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  5. Which witch is which?

    That guy had me confused—just as I was pondering if you could create jellyfish the same way only using snot …

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  6. Easy enough for children under ten to understand and that’s exactly the mentality the bible targets. Once kids buy in to this crap then the adults warn them about how disbelief will send them to a fiery bottomless pit for eternity so naturally they remain scared for years, some for life, unable to get past the idea that it was all made up.

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    • Woody,

      It takes a well educated, astute mind to understand the Bible.

      Using an uneducated, childlike mind is why so many people (people like you) have problems with the Bible.

      Just think about it for a nanosecond or two…

      The Bible was written in antiquity by over 40 authors from the various tribes of Israel, Moses excepted.

      How can an uneducated child possibly understand what is going on?

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      • Basen,

        “But the Bible says that one must become as a child to understand,” is a stellar example of an oft misunderstood scriptural passage.

        Think about it for a nanosecond or two…

        What does it even mean to become like a child?

        It certainly doesn’t mean becoming stupid and gullible.

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      • John,

        The Bible is a compendium on human nature. It is one of the deepest, most meaningful collection of literature on the Planet.

        Calling someone who comprehends the vast deepness of the Bible, stupid and gullible is like calling the works of Shakespeare trite drivel.

        If you were to do such a thing, you would be exposing your ignorance like an exquisite stripper who exposes her private parts to a bunch of drunks

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      • “The Bible was written in antiquity by over 40 authors from the various tribes of Israel …”

        And if they were around today they would likely have an intellect comparable to a modern 10 year old SOM

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      • Woody,

        The Bible has been acknowledged by scholars from antiquity to the present and from one culture to another as being deep and steeped in wisdom.

        But here come the postmodern atheists who think they, of all people, of all times, have the superior intellect and understanding to call some of mankind’s best literature, childish.

        You people need to get a clue.

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      • “The Bible has been acknowledged by scholars from antiquity to the present and from one culture to another as being deep and steeped in wisdom”

        That’s a bit hyperbolic SOM. I suspect these scholars had strong ties to the church in the first place so their views are bound to be a bit biased.

        Perhaps the poetry in the Bible has some “deep and steep” aspects to it, and the literature is entertaining but clearly material from fantasy. But the claims that cannot hold a candle to scientific discovery of today make the geniuses of the Bible look foolish. If they were transplanted to our time today and we were able to converse with them in their language their entire concept of the world would be shattered once they learned that earth is part of single solar system out of millions within millions of galaxies with other planets that revolve around the sun and that mankind’s origins were 3 million years earlier than their time line in Genesis allows. And the hallucinations cited in Revelation clearly show that the author of that piece was having some serious mental health issues

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      • Woody,

        I am not being hyperbolic in the least.

        The Bible has been one of our Western Heritage’s Great Books, for centuries.

        Even if you think the Bible is total fiction, it is still of tremendous literary and social value, even more then Homer’s, “Iliad,” which is also considered one of the West’s Great Books.

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      • “The Bible has been one of our Western Heritage’s Great Books, for centuries.”

        Considering that it was one of the few books around long before the printing press, interests in the tome was already there when it became available to most people who lived in church-dominated states. It’s existence under these limited conditions gave it an advantage that others soon to follow didn’t have. It had a history before it was even read by individuals. It didn’t hurt either that what was in it was passed off as truth at the pulpit and unilaterally supported by both church and state authority figures for centuries. That kind of influence will impact how it is held in esteem “for centuries”, not because it actually was an intellectual masterpiece.

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      • The sad part, SOM, is that what you said back there is absolutely true. The Bible is steeped in wisdom. Undeniably.

        But: (always a ‘but’, dammit) but it’s also steeped in undeserved violence and utter mayhem. Not good. A few good bits here and there hardly negate all the terror and viciousness.

        But (again) (apologies …) “The Bible was written in antiquity by over 40 authors from the various tribes of Israel, Moses excepted.How can an uneducated child possibly understand what is going on?” raises a valid point—why are innocent little children inflicted with this stuff that they can’t possibly understand (you know, analyse, criticise … that sort of thing).
        Wasn’t it the the proud boast of the Jesuits, to the effect that give ’em a kid till the age of seven and he’s theirs (trapped) forever?

        Wouldn’t it be fairer—as in more just—if all sides got equal time; but only after the kid was taught the rudiments of critical thinking? Half an hour of Bible, followed by half an hour of Koran, followed by half an hour of … etc etc ad infinitem; and to hell with real schoolwork. No?

        And I love a lot of the Bible for some of the undeniable truths (and great literature) therein. But as a guide for the citizen: not good. And to inflict it on the impressionable young—even more not good.

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  7. I did try to ‘study’ the Bible, several times. I didn’t get far at all. As for the holey Koran I couldn’t get into it—take out all the grovelling salutations and stuff and there’s nothing left.

    At the time of the Vietnam war I read Giap’s book on a flight Ozz to NZ (whatever it was called, I’ve long forgotten) and the only way I could read it was to blitz through with a red ballpoint underlining anything that made sense.
    Then I read only the red bits—which promptly told me that the Americans didn’t stand a chance in hell* of winning. (I left the book on the plane lest customs find it in my possession and not like me …)

    * And he was right.

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    • Horus Gilgamesh… What a name! Brilliant find, my friend. You are truly a walking resource of the finest absurdities 🙂

      That image of the cows screwing is going to stay me for a long, long time.

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  8. “Zebras have been the subject of African folk tales which tell how they got their stripes. According to a San folk tale of Namibia, the zebra was once all white, but acquired its black stripes after a fight with a baboon over a waterhole. After kicking the baboon so hard, the zebra lost his balance and tripped over a fire, and the fire sticks left scorch marks all over his white coat” (wiki)

    There ya go John ! It was “fire sticks” 🙂

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  9. Doh! Did you see Colorstorm did a post going on about how if his god didn’t exist where did the names for animals come from? I just … I just … could he be a troll? Please say he’s a troll, please say that kind of thought couldn’t seriously come from a human brain …

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    • He’s used that line before and it sent my head spinning. A troll? No, no chance. Nothing like SOM, who is a genius. Notice CS won’t ever answer whether he’s married or not. That’s odd.

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    • No violet, it had to do with ‘wisdom’ which you said was commonplace, and how I corrected your case of myopia.

      The existence of God is obvious, and hardly needs defended btw. 😉

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      • The existence of The Owner of All Infernal Names is obvious, yes. Indeed, is it not the most profoundly obvious of all proofs for the degeneracy of this world that a child’s first reaction upon discovering themselves alive inside it is to scream in absolute horror?
        If this world were good, if it had been crafted by a maximally powerful artisan eternally mindful of the happiness of all things to which he is ultimately responsible then surely a child’s first reaction would be to giggle and to laugh, to greet this treasure with a resounding exaltation of liberated joy, not panic and utter dread. Indeed, if entering this existence was something to celebrate then maternity wards across the planet would reverberate with the elated sounds of spontaneous and uninhibited delight, not the shrieks of terror as new-borns found themselves awake in a world hopelessly given over to the production of misery.

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      • ….or perhaps the little babe as being one of Adam’s posterity………. is agreeing with nature and God as to the devastating proof of Adam’s rather large mistake.

        Or simply the voice of life, so misunderstood and misinterpreted. Take your pick.

        Chew on this for ten years………..oh wait, no guarantee even of your next breath. 😉

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      • Ah, so a child is guilty of something they never did. How thoroughly equitable! Didn’t Jesus, though, cure that disease? I mean, that was the whole point of the blood sacrifice, was it not?

        You do know, though, Colourstorm, your belief (and especially your imaginative theodicies) makes The Owner of All Infernal Names‘ pleased. He appreciates every effort men make to not see the nature of His creation. That is the beauty of theism. It is a self-inflicted wound.

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  10. Pingback: Atheist Nutballs | The Praetorian Writers Group

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